itsbenedict:

johnjennetteart:

Randall Munroe’s book Thing Explainer is coming November 24th, explaining complicated things using only the 1,000 most common English words. I took this spell checker for a spin: splasho.com/upgoer5/

What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little dog woman? I’ll have you know I was top of my class in the water fight people, and I’ve been all up in many hidden fights on the brown killing people, and I have over 300 real kills. I am trained in hidden fighting and I’m the top far away gun man in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another person I have to kill. I will wipe you the fuck out with perfect not missing the likes of which has never been seen before on this world, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the computer? Think again, fuck guy. As we speak I am talking to my hidden group of hidden knowing people across the US and your computer name is being figured out right now so you better get ready for the bad rain, baby fly. The bad rain that wipes out the sad little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be in any place, any time, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my not wearing clothes hands. Not only am I very trained in not armed fighting, but I can get the entire gun store of the US Water Fighting Guys and I will use it to its full power to wipe your sad ass off the face of the big land, you little shit. If only you could have known what very bad attack your little “funny” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the money, you god damn bad at thinking person. I will shit anger all over you and you will go under water in it. You’re fucking dead, kid.

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